highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
vagina is talking i cant
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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