i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
