After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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