I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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