hotel room ftw
I need help removing her.
I cockslap morals
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
