i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
