Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize