Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
