We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
