i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize