idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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