She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
