Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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