We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
