Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
