you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize