Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
