No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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