when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize