That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
