do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
