It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
They took my balls.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
