So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
