oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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