He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize