Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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