yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
