Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
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