You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
