I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
