Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
