everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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