I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You took a bar mat shot.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
