I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
