Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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