Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize