So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You pole danced in your parka.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
