Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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