so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
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