Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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