You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize