Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i permit you to call me
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
