She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
