Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
