I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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