When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
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