bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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