Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
