Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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