u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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