11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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