we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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