her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
